Very well written! The setting and details are very clearly and beautifully described in your game. I wish it was less text heavy and included more pictures. Overall, great work!
I really enjoyed the prose, the surrealism, and the overall structure. I admire the subtlety of your use of variables and multiple-choice, giving us some control over the outcomes without steering too much form the may points here. The prose feels lived-in, with details that feel earned through observation. What to improve on? I honestly just want more (specially more exploration of the contrast between astronaut and "real" world). I could also see an argument for adding a bit more imagery. I don't think is necessary to repeat yourself with text and image (in other words, illustrate the words verbatim), but add pictures that reveal more aspects of the world. You may also benefit from exploring Twine transitions, in order to create a more dynamic delivery of text without actually changing the writing style. My two cents
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Very well written! The setting and details are very clearly and beautifully described in your game. I wish it was less text heavy and included more pictures. Overall, great work!
This is really well written. There is a lot of text though. I think it would benefit from adding more art.
I really enjoyed the prose, the surrealism, and the overall structure. I admire the subtlety of your use of variables and multiple-choice, giving us some control over the outcomes without steering too much form the may points here. The prose feels lived-in, with details that feel earned through observation. What to improve on? I honestly just want more (specially more exploration of the contrast between astronaut and "real" world). I could also see an argument for adding a bit more imagery. I don't think is necessary to repeat yourself with text and image (in other words, illustrate the words verbatim), but add pictures that reveal more aspects of the world. You may also benefit from exploring Twine transitions, in order to create a more dynamic delivery of text without actually changing the writing style. My two cents
I think this is good but maybe you can make the texts shorter so the player can keep paying attention to the game .